it’s not fun trying to re-train yourself. your patterns. the way you think and handle yourself during every moment of every day. I don’t know if it’s something that needs to be done, I just know that I’m not comfortable with where I’m putting myself - where I persistently insist I need to be. it’s like I’ve got something to prove to someone that doesn’t even exist. “look what I can do!” watch me take control. the beautiful part about it all is that I don’t have any ~extreme emotion. I’m not running off feeling, I’m running off of some illogical logic that I conjured up on a night similar to this one, not too long ago.
